malconformation

….from facing your fears….and from facing yourself?  I know I do.  What is it that you do??

This is one of the things I do…I buy houses.  About every two years, I get the itch to change residences.  But, this home here in Bella Vista, Arkansas…is different.  I’m putting down roots. Literally and figuratively.  I’m fixing, remodeling, and planting.  Making Noelle (I know, I ALWAYS name my homes and cars!), the piece of art that she is.  And, in the process, working on myself.

Opening up walls        letting the light in

A friend (who is a realtor), used to ask me, “I know you love fixing up homes, but, what exactly are you running from?”

Mike Drop.

A few months of being a tad pissed off.

Which always seems to happen when someone asks you the hard question when you don’t want to face YOUR truth.

Today – after a night of sleeping on the bathroom floor because of a bad case of the flu – I have had the time (Thank you GUS), to reflect more on my patterns and reluctance to look at them.

Moving takes time and energy.  Granted, it is something that I LOVE doing, but, it is multi-layered.  As is everything that happens on this earthly plain.  Time and energy that I told myself was my passion…and it really was…and still is…but, it goes deeper.

A Cancer’s home is their sanctuary.  I made a lot of sanctuaries, and never took the time to enjoy them.  To just take time to be, and look deeper within.

TO PUT DOWN ROOTS.

To work on the hard stuff.

It’s amazing what is coming up.

I tend to be a bit flighty – it’s hard for me to buckle down – but, when I do – good things always happen.  When I do the “work” and face my fears, they seem to become smaller…I write about this a lot…but, I think it is important to always uncover more layers…Just like the demon mastax…chasing you…only to find out it was/is a chihuahua.

So, if you feel comfortable sharing – what is it that YOU do?

We really are walking together as one people.

We are more alike than we are different.

Blessings,

Paula

Trust YOUR intuition (and while you’re at it stop listening to your DAMN ego!)

I have two very vulnerable stories about not trusting MY intuition, (instead accepting someone else’s!), and listening to my ego…

A very large portion of artists’ DREAM of being in galleries.

I’ve been no exception.

Which has led me to lesson learning.

LESSON ONE

Three years ago I was contacted by a gallery in England.  I HAD THE CHANCE OF BEING AN INTERNATIONAL ARTIST!  She was just starting out – which made me a tad bit hesitant – but – AN INTERNATIONAL ARTIST!  I didn’t ask enough questions.  I wanted to be AN INTERNATIONAL ARTIST!  I shipped them…over $10,000 worth of art. Two years later, and only one very highly discounted sale, I contacted her to ask that she ship the remaining paintings back.  Long story, but suffice it to say, the paintings are still there, and she refuses to communicate with me.

I DIDN”T TRUST MY INTUITION!

LESSON TWO

I was introduced to a local gallery by a friend whom I considered a good judge of character.  I got a horrid case of the heebie jeebies when I spoke to the owner on the phone.  Meeting him, my radar went on high alert.  And, instead of heeding all of the warning bells, I left my artwork there, with the promise of payment the moment a painting sold.

The first painting sold early June.  I expected a check.  I communicated with him two weeks later. The check was promised in two weeks.  Two weeks went by.  No check.  More communication.  With the promise of a check on Monday.  When I asked if I could come over and pick it up – the conversation went silent.

Every cell in my body told me to get my artwork immediately.

And so I did.

Why didn’t I listen to my intuition?

Why did I rely on my friend’s words rather than the hair on the back of my neck standing on end?

These are my words of wisdom for artists around these two “lessons”.

Decide first whether or not you WANT to be in galleries.

There are many ways for an artist to make a living.

Ask questions.

LOTS AND LOTS OF QUESTIONS.

After all, if they are on the up and up, they will be honest and straight forward.  They will encourage you to ask other artists about their experience.

Have a contract with YOUR terms.

If they won’t sign it – RUN.

Right now, I have $9900 worth of art in England, that I will never see again, because I didn’t trust my intuition.

Thank God, I listened to my gut and picked up my art before the situation repeated itself.

I’m learning…slowly…but always going forward.

I may stumble and fall, but the important thing, is that I keep trying.

I should have paid attention to MY knowing.

Any time I do things out of fear (I “needed” money), ego (AN INTERNATIONAL ARTIST!), or don’t listen (EXPENSIVE “mistakes”) – things turn out poorly.

Heed those warning bells.

Ask questions.

Be curious.

Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want.

Blessings,

Paula

(937) 909-1757

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